Being decisive
Our level of decisiveness is all depending on our feeling of being secure.
Even the impulsive decision-maker, that tends to make decisions without
thinking is sure that his decision will lead to success, and even if not all
will be good one way or the other, or simply will try again.
How secure we feel is depending on several factors.
-Mood
-Stress level
-Emotional state
-Expectations
-Personality (especially the belief system)
-Environment
-Mental state
-Physical state
The 6 chain links of a decision-making process are similar to this
example.
Here based on a restaurant visit, if the outcome is supposed to be optimal:
1. Realization a decision needs to be made
I feel hungry and I don`t feel like cooking
2. Collect information
What do I feel like eating; how hungry am I, which Restaurants do I know, are
they open. Do I have money?
3. Checking for alternatives
Checking Fridge or Freezer if there is anything that needs little prep time.
Calling mom if she has leftovers
4. Evaluating all information
Do I feel like calling mom, no?
Do I have enough in Fridge or Freezer, no?
Do I have money, yes?
Is the Chinese Restaurant I like open, yes.
5. Comparing the options
I reason if I should spend the money, get dressed, or rather call mom still
6. Good attitude to follow through
I don`t call mom, get dressed and eat at the Restaurant….Happy end!
In the example, this was a good decision. Or better a chain of decisions,
because each part consists of one or more separate decisions.
A usual decision stopper is the third chain link; Checking for
alternatives. If several are found insecurity might set in and it
might become almost unbearable to make a decision.
-One Restaurant has good Service, but the food is not so good.
-Another Restaurant the Food is great, but the Service sucks.
-One Restaurant is close by, the other I need to drive to.
-Moms food is the Best still, but I don`t want to have to talk to her today.
-If I saved the money I could buy myself the long-needed headset.
-Am I hungry enough for eating at a Restaurant
-Maybe it is going to rain.
-Maybe I should stay home.
If that merry-go-round starts at some point it becomes so annoying that we
maybe start playing “Catch a tiger by the toe” until one final the option is left.
Then the sixth chain link; a Good (or not so Good) attitude to follow
through; comes into play. Will the merry-go-round stop turning
or go on?
For some of us, it is already an ordeal to decide if one is hungry or not, let
alone to decide if or what Restaurant to take.
We all have experienced a situation as such one way or another. The regularity
of indecisiveness makes a difference in how to approach a solution. There are
solutions; several; but there is no simple pill that helps to overcome the
feeling of insecurity of “Do I make the right decision”?.
Let`s Talk if you have trouble making decisions!
Namaste
Armaan
